


Team Free Will Goes To NightVale

by TheJelliphish



Category: Supernatural, Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Angels dont exist, Castiel and Dean Winchester Have a Profound Bond, M/M, The Voice of Night Vale, The Weather (Welcome to Night Vale), Typical Night Vale Weirdness, cas and carlos get along well, i dont have a plot, kevin is scary, oh well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:13:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28437441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheJelliphish/pseuds/TheJelliphish
Summary: “Oh. Wow. What are we getting ourselves into?” asked Dean “A strange Dog Park? Hooded Figures?”Dean, Sam, and Castiel go to Night Vale. They can't figure out what is a case. Everyone acts like this is all normal. Ghosts coaching Little League??? Angels??? Houses that do not exist??
Relationships: Carlos/Cecil Palmer, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 12
Kudos: 40





	1. Welcome To Night Vale

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all like this!! I think Ceec might be a bit out of charcter, sorry 'bout that!

“There is a case. There have been strange happenings in a town called Night Vale. I need you boys to go and check it out,” Bobby said from over the phone.

“Alright, but you gotta give us more info than that,” Dean said “Where is Night Vale, and what happened?”

“Oh, well...as for where it is...I’m not sure. And what’s been happening the list is very very long,” Bobby said.

“Well, that’s helpful,” Dean said, rolling his eyes.

\----------------------------------

They were driving down a dusty road. Sam was napping in the backseat, and Cas and Dean were in the front. The radio crackled to life.

“Hello listeners,” The radio said. “There are two men driving towards Night Vale as I speak. They appear to have an Erika with them, of course Erikas do not exist,”

“Which one of us is the Erika? And what even is an Erika?” Dean asked.

“I have no idea,” Cas responded.

\----------------------------------  
Dean pulled the impala into the driveway of the local radio station. They would ask for help there. Dean looked around the parking lot. There was a small tan car in one corner, and a bright pink VW Beetle that seemed to have been bedazzled and had those fake eyelash things. 

The three men walked into the station. Sam rang the bell on the counter. They stood in the lobby for a minute before a young person came out from down the hall. Xe was wearing a purple shirt that read ‘Night Vale Community Radio’ across the breast and a lilac hijab. 

“Follow me,” Xe said and led the boys down the hall. Xe led them off the hall and into a room with a purple cheetah print coach. “You can wait here, I’ll go get Cecil,” Xe said. Dean smiled at xem. Xe walked out of the room and shut the door.

Dean and Cas sat on the coach and Sam went over to a side table. 

“Well, she was nice. I wonder who Cecil is,” Dean said, putting his arm over Cas’s shoulder.

“Xe,” Cas corrected

“What?” Dean said.

“Xe use xe/xem pronouns,” Cas said.

“Oh, oops,” Dean said.

Sam switched on the radio “And Carlos got home from his trip last night! He said that his colleges at the University Of What It Is had no idea where Night Vale is, which is understandable. And now the weather,” the radio said and then music started playing.

“What a strange station,” Castiel said.

The door burst open and an odd looking man walked in. He had purple hair, and what seemed to be a third eye. He was wearing a long pink sequin skirt, green cowboy boots, and a red crop top that said ‘I make science jokes, but only periodically’ 

“Hi! I’m Cecil, how can I help you?” He asked.

“Wait. You are the guy on the radio?” Sam asked.

“Yeah, that’s me,” Cecil said “The voice of Night Vale,”

Cas stood up “Have there been any strange things happening? Mysterious deaths perhaps?” He asked.

Cecil looked Cas straight in the eye and said “You do not exist,”

“I very much do. I’m right in front of you!” He said.

“No. You do not exist. Angels do not exist,” Cecil said.

“Okay, okay. But can you answer the question?” Dean asks.

“Uh..no? Nothing that strange has happened. I mean..It’s been strangely quiet. Pamela Winchell hasn’t made any emergency press conferences in a few days, the City Council hasn’t gone on any pre planned vacations in over a month, and um...Well...the Erikas, who do not exist, have not been begging in front of the Ralph’s for a while now,” Cecil said.

“Um..do you record the news? The ones you report?” Sam asked.

“Yes. We do,” He said.

“Uh, could we borrow them?” Sam asked.

“You don’t need to! I had Intern Carl record them and put them on to a YouTube channel, it’s called ‘Welcome to NightVale’,” Cecil beamed.

“Okay, thanks,” Sam said.

\----------------------------------

Back at the motel room they were lying on the beds listening to the recorded news. They were starting at the beginning.

“Ready?” Dean asked, when they nodded he started the video.

“A friendly desert community, where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep. Welcome to Night Vale,” Cecil said, music played. 

Cas said “Hm, mysterious lights. Strange,” Sam took a note.

“Hello listeners. To start things off, I’ve been asked to read this brief notice. The City Council announces the opening of a new Dog Park at the corner of Earl and Somerset, near the Ralphs. They would like to remind everyone that dogs are not allowed in the Dog Park. People are not allowed in the Dog Park. It is possible you will see hooded figures in the Dog Park. Do not approach them. Do not approach the Dog Park. The fence is electrified and highly dangerous. Try not to look at the Dog Park and especially do not look for any period of time at the Hooded Figures. The Dog Park will not harm you,” The recording said.

“Oh. Wow. What are we getting ourselves into?” asked Dean “A strange Dog Park? Hooded Figures?”

“Yeah, I don’t know, man. This place is weird,” Sam said.

“And now the news. Old Woman Josie, out near the car lot, says the Angels revealed themselves to her. Said they were ten feet tall, radiant, one of them was black. Said they helped her with various household chores. One of them changed a light bulb for her, the porch light. She’s offering to sell the old light bulb, which has been touched by an angel (it was the black angel, if that sweetens the pot for anyone). If you’re interested, contact Old Woman Josie. She’s out near the car lot,” Cecil said.

“What? That’s not what Angels look like!” Castiel said.

Alarms went off. The TV flashes white and then the screen turns purple. In black letters it says ‘ANgEls dO nOt exIsT. ThIs iS yoUr lasT warNInG. We wIll HaVe to ReEduCaTe yOu iF you MakE ThAt MistAke AGaiN,”

“Oookay then,” Dean said.

They kept listening to the recordings.

\----------------------------------

“Hello, Carlos, honey?” Cecil said through the mail slot. When there was no answer he opened the door and went in.

Carlos was sitting criss cross on his desk. He was reading a book upside down. He pulled his necklace out of his mouth “Oh hello! How are you, Ceece?” He said, jumping off the desk.

“Well, some strange men came to the station today,” Cecil started.

“Yes, I heard. Was that why you came over here?” Carlos asked.

“Yeah, they were asking about strange things happening. I was wondering if I could send them over here, so you could show them your science?” Cecil said.

Carlos hopped up and down “Yes! Yes! Please do!”He exclaimed.

“Alright, I will. I’ll let you get back to science,” Cecil said. He kissed his husband on the nose and left.

\----------------------------------

There was a knock on the motel room door. Sam opened the door.

“Hello,” He said.

“Hi, I was wondering if you would like to talk to my husband. He could help with your investigation,” Cecil said.

“Yeah, where is he? What does he do?” Dean asked.

Cecil’s eyes were sparkling “Carlos is a scientist,” He said, softly smiling. “He’s in his science lab,”

“Okay, can you take us to him?”

\----------------------------------

Cecil open a the door “Carlooossss! Sweetheart! The intruders are here!” He called.

A handsome man came out from the back “Hello, I’m Carlos The Scientist-Palmer,” He said.

“Hello,” Cas said “Could we ask you some questions about the town?”

\----------------------------------


	2. The Moonlite All Nite Diner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas, Cecil, and Dean go out for lunch.

Sam and Carlos were still talking. “Hey Sammy! Cas and I are gonna go grab some grub! Hope that’s okay,” Dean said before grabbing the Angel’s hand. 

Cecil walked up to them “Can I join you boys?” He asked

“Yes. Sure,” Cas said.

As Dean was looking at the man he noticed that the eye on Cecil’s forehead was blinking. He had assumed it had been a tattoo. He let his gaze fall down the man’s body and he noticed that he had purple tentacles and eyes on his neck and arms as well. The tentacles seemed to move ever so slightly. And, once again, the eyes appeared to be blinking.

“What’s with your tattoos?” Dean asked suddenly.

Cecil cocked his head “What do you mean? They are purple tentacles and eyes?”

“Yeah, but how do they move?” Dean asked

“Well you can’t see out of eyes if they don’t blink, silly,” Cecil giggled.

“I-” Dean said, before just giving up.

\----------------------------------

The three men arrived at The Moonlite All Nite Diner. They sat down in a booth and ordered. Cas and Dean both got burgers, Dean got a slice of pie, and Cecil ordered a corn salad.

When the food arrived Dean and Cas were both disappointed that the burgers came without a bun. And Dean was deeply distressed that the plate for his pie was empty.

“Where’s my pie?” He asked worriedly

The server pointed at the empty plate “It’s right there. You ordered the invisible pie,” She explained

“Oh. Can I get real pie?” He asked

She chuckled “I’m sorry sir, but that’s the only type of pie we serve,”

“That’s...strange,” Dean said.

They dug into their meals. Besides the fact that Cas found an entire eyeball in his burger, the meal was good. 

Cecil decided to break the silence “Why do you dress like that?” He asked Dean.

Dean looked up from his food “What do you mean?”

“Why do you and your brother wear so much plaid?” Cecil asked.

“You’re asking about how we dress?” Dean asked.

Cecil nodded “Yes. You dress very strangely. I haven’t seen anyone dress nearly as badly as you since Carlos first moved here. And even he wasn’t that bad,”

Dean said “Hey! I look fine!”. Cas had dissolved into giggles behind him.

“I’m just saying, you should probably leave before Fashion Week. If you are still here then, the Fashion Sphere will most definitely kill you,” Cecil said.

Dean and Cas both needed a moment to register what Cecil had said.

“So anyways, what are you doing today?” Cas asked

Cecil paled “Ah. I forgot. Kevin is visiting,”

“Who’s Kevin?” Castiel asked

“He’s the radio host at Desert Bluffs Community Radio,” Cecil explained.

“Is he your friend?” Cas asked.

“No. God no,” Cecil said shaking his head, “I hate the guy,”

“Oh. Would you like us to accompany you?” Cas offered.

Cecil’s many eyes blinked “You would do that?”

Cas smiled “Of course,”

“Please do. But you might get scared,” Cecil said

Dean chuckled “I think we’ll be fine. We’ve dealt with more than you know,”

“Okay then,” Cecil agreed

\----------------------------------

They went back to Carlos’s lab to pick up Sam and Carlos before meeting with Kevin.

“Hey honey,” Cecil said as Carlos slid into the seat next to his husband. 

Carlos kissed Cecil on the forehead, right over the third eye “Hey Ceece,”

“Right, Cas. Get in the back, Sammy’s up front with me,” Dean ordered.

Cas frowned “Do I have too? I like the front,” He complained.

“Yes, get in the back. It’s my car, I’m in charge,” Dean repeated.

Cas grumbled but got in the back anyways. Sam slid into shotgun.

“Could we listen to Fey’s station?” Cecil asked

“No. What is it?” Dean asked

“It’s where my friend Fey broadcasts!” Cecil explained “She reads strings of numbers,”

“Yeah, no,” Dean said while he switched on his music.

They went the rest of the drive in silence, except when Dean asked Cecil for directions. When they arrived at a park in Desert Bluffs they parked at the curb and went to wait for Kevin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this chapter please leave a comment!
> 
> I'm really excited for next chapter!


	3. The Smiling God

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet Kevin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had fun with this one!

\----------------------------------

A man who looked exactly like Cecil walked towards them, except instead of tentacles he had desert roses tattooed across his tan skin. His tattoos were dark yellow. “Hello Cecil!” he yelled “Oh! You brought friends!”

When he came closer Dean noticed with horror the man had pure black eyes and the corners of his mouth reached all the way up to near his ears.

As Kevin walked over Dean splashed a bit of holy water on him. No burning. Strange, he had the eyes of a demon, but wasn’t?

Carlos stood up and reached out to shake Kevin’s hand, but Kevin embraced him in a large hug.

Kevin pulled back, holding Carlos at arms length. “Carlos! It’s been so long since I’ve seen you! Last time I saw you must have been right before you left the Desert Otherworld!” His smile faltered, but only for a moment “You are still as handsome as ever! Cecil’s a lucky one!”

Cecil grimaced and pulled his husband away from Kevin. “Yes. I sure am lucky to have such a wonderful husband,” He said through his teeth, putting emphasis on ‘husband’.

‘Oh boy,’ Dean thought ‘this is gonna be a long afternoon,’

\----------------------------------

“Dean,” Sam whispered “Get over here,”

Dean walked over to his brother “What’s up Sammy?”

“Are you sure that guy isn’t a demon?” Sam asked

Dean shrugged “He looks like one, doesn’t he. I did get some holy water on him so I don’t know,”

“Well, I’m gonna go ask Cecil about him,” Sam said, before walking off to Cecil.

Cas walked over “Dean. Kevin is not a demon. I do not know what he is, unfortunately,” He said

“That’s okay, buddy,” Dean said.

\----------------------------------

Sam approached a sulking Cecil. “Hello, Sam,” Cecil said, looking up from his phone.

“Can I ask you a few questions about Kevin?” Sam asked

“You should ask him, I bet he’d love to tell you all about himself. And his darling Desert Bluffs,” Cecil said, his voice filled with venom.

“Uh, okay. I’ll do that,” Sam said, backing away from the perturbed radio host.

He walked over to Kevin “Kevin. May I ask you a few questions?” Sam asked

“Sure! Ask away!” Kevin said.

“Okay, thanks,” Sam sat down next to the smiling man, he turned on the recording device “Why is your mouth so wide?”

“Because Strex Corp cut it!” Kevin said all too happily.

Sam's eyes widened and gasped “Oh. That’s horrible. What’s Strex Corp?” He asked

Kevin giggled “It’s not horrible, it’s joyus! Anyways, Strex Corp is my employer! They are wonderful and happy! They taught me to be happy and productive!”

“Oh. Um...that’s interesting,” Sam said, nodding slowly. “I heard you talking about the smiling god, could you tell me about that?” He asked.

“Of course! The Smiling God is Joyous and will someday bring us to the Devouring! I started The Joyous Congregation Of The Smiling God so that others could someday be Devoured!” Kevin explained.

“Oh,” Sam said wordlessly.

“And then on All Smiles Eve we exchange gifts and tell the story of The Smiling God, and those who don’t smile get their smiles!” Kevin continued

“What do you mean ‘get their smiles’?” Sam asked

Kevin just pointed to the cuts at the corners of his mouth.

“Oh, how do you do that?” Sam asked, he was terrified of the man sitting next to him, but his morbid curiosity got the better of him.

Kevin smiled impossibly wider “Broken glass! Just like Felicia did!”

Sam gulped “Who’s Felicia?”

“Felicia was the first worshipper of The Smiling God, and was one of the first to be Devoured!”

Sam nodded “Is this ‘devouring’ a metaphor for something?” Sam hoped it was.

Kevin chuckled “Of course not!”

“Alright, thanks so much for answering my questions,” Sam said, getting up.

Kevin waved “Anytime,”

Sam walked away as quickly as he could without being rude.

\----------------------------------

Sam speed walked towards his brother. “Dean. That guy is fucking insane,” He said quitely.

“What did he say?” Dean asked.

“You can hear,” Sam said, playing the recording for Dean and Castiel.

After the men had finished listening to recording Dean decided to break the silence.

“Yeah, you were right. He’s fucking insane,” Dean said “Let’s get out of here,”

\----------------------------------

Cecil, Carlos, Castiel, Sam, and Dean all piled into the impala after saying their goodbyes.

“Now can we listen to Fey’s broadcast?” Cecil whined.

“I am interested in listening to that too,” Cas added.

Dean looked over his shoulder at the two men giving him puppy dog eyes. “Fine,” He gave in and switched on the radio. “What station is she on?”

The moment he switched on the station the car filled with numbers.

“183926446290183652783544136278390021655302865423314526738846354126143524281936,” the radio said.

“This station sucks,” Dean said, switching it off. He turned on his music.

“Hey!” Cecil yelled.

\----------------------------------

Dean parked Baby in the motel parking lot.

Dean sat down on the bed. He popped open a beer and took a sip, “That Kevin was terrifying,” he admitted.

“Yeah,” Sam agreed “Are we gonna have to kill him?”

Dean laughed “I don’t think we could, if we tried,” he joked. He passed his beer to Cas.

Cas took a sip of the beer and passed it back “thank you,” he said quietly.

“We can kill anything,” Sam said

“Sam, are you going to make a page on The Smiling God?” Cas asked

“Maybe, if we can get more info about it,” Sam answered

\----------------------------------

Sam awoke with a start. A loud shrieking noise was coming from the park across the street.

Sam looked over to the bed next to him where his brother and Cas were still fast asleep in each other's arms. He decided to try and get back to sleep.

\----------------------------------

The next morning they were sitting in a booth at The Moonlite All Nite Diner

“I don’t really see a case here,” Sam said

“Yeah, there is so much weirdness, but they all see it as normal,” Dean said

“So are we heading out?” Castiel asked

“Yup,” Dean said, stealing abite of Cas’s food

“Can I at least say goodbye to Carlos? And Cecil?” cas asked.

Dean nodded “Alright,”

\----------------------------------

Cecil heard the bell ring, just as the weather started. He ran out to the lobby.

“Hello!” He sang.

“Hey, Cecil,” Dean greeted

Cecil smoothed down his skirts, he was wearing an old dress that he used to wear back in the 1800s, “What brings you boys here?” he asked

“We were just heading out and figured we should say goodbye,” Sam explained

Cecil’s face fell “Oh. Well goodbye!” He launched himself at the men and wrapped them all in a bear hug.

“Goodbye, Cecil,” Cas said

\----------------------------------

“The men are driving out of NightVale. I now know their names. Goodbye Dean, Sam, and Castiel,” The radio said as the Impala drove down the dusty road.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like it! Please leave a comment and/or kudos! <3


End file.
